Tuesday, 18 December 2007

Osama Got Run Over By a Reindeer

Inspired by TimT's post on Christmas Carols I thought I'd add a carol I'd heard on radio recently.

Usually I'm not big on carols that are Aussified versions of the original carol. Mostly they aren't that well sung, and not very witty.

On the other hand, this was a modern American version of a carol, and while it doesn't bring the "Joy to the World" that "Silent Night" or "Jingle Bells" does, the lyrics are worth a peek, I think.

Osama got run over by a reindeer
Walking out of his cave Christmas eve
You can say there's no such thing as Santa
But as for we in America, we believe

He'd been blowing up too many buildings
So we said he had to go
But he hid in his cave in Afghanistan
Defiant as he was, he said, "Hell, no!"
When we found him Christmas morning
It was clear he'd been attacked
There was a note stuck to his forehead
It said, "Either give up now or we'll go bomb Iraq!"

(repeat chorus)

Now we're all so proud of George Bush
He's been taking this so well
See him in the Oval Office
Knowing that Osama's really going to Hell
It's not Christmas with bin Laden
Nor for Saddam in Iraq
And we just can't help but wonder
Should we go bomb Baghdad in a sneak attack?
(Bomb Iraq!)

(repeat chorus)

Now the cards are on the table
See George W. dance a jig (Ah!)
And the red, white, and blue candles
(Gore thought that the election had been rigged!)
I warned all you stinkin' terrorists
Better watch out for yourselves!
They should not make hijacking weapons
Out of stuff that you would find upon the shelves!

(repeat chorus)

Sing it, George W.!

(repeat chorus)


TimT said...

I stand by what I said before: there might be a good Aussified Christmas carol out there, but I've yet to hear it!

It's usually the ones with Santa in it that make me a little queasy - all the saccharine ones, like 'Santa Claus is coming', 'Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer', 'Jingle Bells', and 'White Christmas'. Generally the ones with good melodies come from a time when it was unecessary to reference Santa every time Christmas rolled around.

Maria said...

Well, TimT, you better watch out, you better not cry ... because Santa Claus is figuring out who's getting presents and you had better acknowledge the King of Coca Cola or else!

I'm not a big fan of Santa Claus is Coming.

The main thing I like about Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer is somehow it prompts me to remember all the reindeer names and I'd forget them otherwise. But I never quite got the rationale of the song ... hmmm ... I feel a post coming on.

Jingle Bells is ok for me.

I prefer things, however, like Silent Night, O Little Town of Bethlehem, Good King Wenceslas.

Call me old fashioned, but sometimes I cringe at how rockstars feel absolutely impelled to jazz things up with their tunes, and produce rocking hip tunes for songs that absolutely sound best with good, strong solid voices and a fantastic back up ensemble. Often they try to mess with the rhythm and sometimes the tune, and it often doesn't sound better.

TimT said...

Apparently New Zealanders recently voted Mariah Carey's 'All I Want for Christmas' as one of the best Christmas songs ever.


They also hate Snoopy!

nailpolishblues said...

I don't like Snoopy much either. Still, as a nation they obviously have even shitter taste in music than I do.

Maria said...

nailpolishblues and NZ ... grrrr ... grrrr .....

I like Snoopy!

I happened to like the Peanuts gang, it was Garfield whom I couldn't find endearing. The charm of a fat selfish sarcastic cat who had a loser owner and a slobberish dog was really quite lost on me.

I don't think I'd fit in with the New Zealanders. I didn't think anyone had worse taste in music than I did, but perhaps they take the cake. They can also take the Mariah Carey Christmas CD with them ... oops, think I've got it somewhere here ... wait ...

nailpolishblues said...

I find it harder to be mean about them as a nation now that I'm kinda-sorta related. If only my sister...oh never mind.

I quite like Garfield. Bits of him anyway. I certainly understand being permanently sarcastic and taking to your bed and hiding your head under the pillow.

I'm not a huge fan of comics in general though. Don't even get me started on the ghost who fucking walks.

Maria said...

Actually nailpolishblues, I certainly understand both the hiding under the pillow and the sarcasm, but I'm not a big fan of Garfield. (I spent quite a bit of this morning under the pillow.) Perhaps he's a bit too close to home. And I know the joke before I've read the second frame, let alone the third. In fact, sometimes before I've read the first.

I hear the movie Garfield, the one with the cat in it, not the cartoon movie, wasn't too funny.