As many people know I'm most unfortunately out of employment and trying to find something new to do with my life. The applications are going out, and I'm baying at the moon, howling for a job.
It's a harsh world when employers don't appreciate you and I hate interviews. I hate 'em. Really I do.
And I've come to the conclusion that perhaps I should just become an entrepreneur. You know. Just invent some things and sell them.
The real problem is I don't know what to invent yet.
But once I've overcome that minor hiccup in my plan, I'm sure Orange Juice Snobbery Products Pty & Ltd will be a roaring success. You just wait and see.
One idea just popped into my mind and I've got a rough sketch going for it.
Welcome to the first OJS Products product ... The New .. in fact the first Hobo-Doll!
We all know how homeless people can earn a fortune. In fact it's shocking that some of them can earn more than what I've earned employed, and they probably can collect a pension as well and it's all tax-free.
Some clear $400 a day, and they're just sitting on their bot-bots in Martin Place with a sign around their necks.
Now, that's all dandy except not all of us want to sit in Martin Place, and what if you could have someone else sitting in Martin Place for you while you went out and got another job or just partied?
Welcome the Hobo-Doll!
The Hobo-Doll is a lovely plump doll that looks EXACTLY like a hobo and dresses like one and will do all your sitting for you and collect the cash. It will even wear a sign around its neck. No matter that it doesn't breathe or eat - no one checks homeless people too carefully for signs of breathing and when was the last time you saw a homeless person eating? Most of the time they don't look up when you throw a coin in.
The Hobo-Doll won't either.
I'm selling the basic doll for $15,000 a pop and if you find a lovely place in the right area, you'll easily earn back that money in a couple of months and more besides. For the better models, there are changes of clothes and a variety of signs, and a special automator that will say "Bless you Jesus Child" "Lord bless you" or "How 'bout a few dollars more for a pint?" whenever you throw in some money, for a touch of realism.
Prices will also differ depending on size, especially plumpness and the most sympathetic slouches cost a bit more. But they're definitely worth the investment.
Note that OJS Products cannot be responsible if you pick to place your doll in a place with low revenue, or if your doll is bashed up and ruined by vicious bikie gangs or jealous buskers. You must be entirely responsible for the safety and intelligent placing of Hobo-Doll!
Hobo-Doll will be your friend and colleague and amazing revenue-raiser - order him or her today!
Showing posts with label employment. Show all posts
Showing posts with label employment. Show all posts
Monday, 12 April 2010
Monday, 22 March 2010
On a Not-Quite-Meeting of the Minds
Recently I've been trying to get a job.
One job I tried for required me to be a good speller. A lady rang me up and said, "I'd like you to do a quick spelling test on the phone. Are you ready?"
"Sure."
"OK, first word. You can write them down if you want. Parallel."
"P-A-R-A-L-L-E-L" I spelled.
"Fabulous!" she said enthusiastically.
Oh good, I thought. I passed word number one. But maybe word number two would be really tricky.
I waited.
And waited.
And waited.
Then finally it clicked.
"Umm, was I supposed to spell 'Fabulous'? I mean, was that the next word?" I asked tentatively.
"Actually I said 'nebulous'," she said.
"Whoops, I mean, I thought you were saying fabulous, I mean that was a comment, I mean saying I was fabulous ..."
My voice trailed off. Maybe I wasn't Fabulous. Heck, perhaps I was Nebulous. And how DID you spell "Parallel", anyhow?
Well I'm glad the next word hadn't been "Loser" or "Unimpressive" because I think I might have dented my ego irreparably. As it was I fortunately got through the test, and fortunately there were not too many other words on it to take personally.
One job I tried for required me to be a good speller. A lady rang me up and said, "I'd like you to do a quick spelling test on the phone. Are you ready?"
"Sure."
"OK, first word. You can write them down if you want. Parallel."
"P-A-R-A-L-L-E-L" I spelled.
"Fabulous!" she said enthusiastically.
Oh good, I thought. I passed word number one. But maybe word number two would be really tricky.
I waited.
And waited.
And waited.
Then finally it clicked.
"Umm, was I supposed to spell 'Fabulous'? I mean, was that the next word?" I asked tentatively.
"Actually I said 'nebulous'," she said.
"Whoops, I mean, I thought you were saying fabulous, I mean that was a comment, I mean saying I was fabulous ..."
My voice trailed off. Maybe I wasn't Fabulous. Heck, perhaps I was Nebulous. And how DID you spell "Parallel", anyhow?
Well I'm glad the next word hadn't been "Loser" or "Unimpressive" because I think I might have dented my ego irreparably. As it was I fortunately got through the test, and fortunately there were not too many other words on it to take personally.
Friday, 13 November 2009
You can rely on me
I may have mentioned before that I'm really utterly failing on this Get a Job thing. And in our society, success is so often tied up in being employed and having lots of money. If there was an award for the most Successful at Being a Failure, I would apply.
What has irked me so often is this thing about being overqualified to do work thing. Employers don't really try to find out anything about you, they make assumptions like if you are overqualified for a job you won't be very dedicated as you'll be very ambitious.
Well, let's just see. I have three tertiary qualifications and I haven't got much experience except in junior administration, do I look like the ambitious type? Please, these idiots really don't think very hard do they?
What I would like to say right now is that I would be a very reliable worker in almost any job, even low level, so long as people weren't totally beating me up every day, just because I HATE INTERVIEWS AND RECRUITERS. I can't stand them. I resent this whole process I am going through every damn day I do it.
I wouldn't try leaping to another job very fast because it would mean having to do ANOTHER STUPID INTERVIEW.
You'd have to be paying me a darn lot to make me take that jump quickly. A small pay rise or a new desk would not cut it. I would probably still sit there screwing tin lids on Cheesybite containers unless I got 300% payrise or something because I hate interviewing so much. It really is annoying the crap outta me!
There! You can rely on me, more than those not-so-bitter trainees who would jump for an extra $100 and a larger cookie jar in the shared kitchen.
What has irked me so often is this thing about being overqualified to do work thing. Employers don't really try to find out anything about you, they make assumptions like if you are overqualified for a job you won't be very dedicated as you'll be very ambitious.
Well, let's just see. I have three tertiary qualifications and I haven't got much experience except in junior administration, do I look like the ambitious type? Please, these idiots really don't think very hard do they?
What I would like to say right now is that I would be a very reliable worker in almost any job, even low level, so long as people weren't totally beating me up every day, just because I HATE INTERVIEWS AND RECRUITERS. I can't stand them. I resent this whole process I am going through every damn day I do it.
I wouldn't try leaping to another job very fast because it would mean having to do ANOTHER STUPID INTERVIEW.
You'd have to be paying me a darn lot to make me take that jump quickly. A small pay rise or a new desk would not cut it. I would probably still sit there screwing tin lids on Cheesybite containers unless I got 300% payrise or something because I hate interviewing so much. It really is annoying the crap outta me!
There! You can rely on me, more than those not-so-bitter trainees who would jump for an extra $100 and a larger cookie jar in the shared kitchen.
Thursday, 12 November 2009
Good luck to my tote bag!
Just the other day I was on my way to an interview with a recruiter.
I was standing at Gordon station when a very non-obliging bird decided to swoop down UNDER THE SHELTER mind you and drop faeces on me.
On my tote bag, that is.
I checked carefully and it didn't get my clothes, and the only bit of me it got was my hand (the hand that was placed on my tote bag).
Yelping, I made my way to the station toilets, swearing "shit shit shit". I felt that at least I should use appropriate language for the moment. Then I tried using the only available accessories (toilet paper, water and soap) to rid my bag of birdy-poo. Oh, and my hand, too.
I missed that train but caught the next and I decided not to regale the recruiter with this amusing story of birdy-droppings at the interview.
However, I have heard the old adage that if a bird chooses to drop its droppings on you, it's good luck! Is this meant to be an omen? Will I get a job with this recruiter? Or does it simply mean I will get no more bird plops?
Or does it mean that my TOTE BAG is to receive the good luck? Will it be a very lucky and fortunate tote bag, that has lots of happiness and longevity in its toting life?
I'm a little confused, but very optimistic!
I was standing at Gordon station when a very non-obliging bird decided to swoop down UNDER THE SHELTER mind you and drop faeces on me.
On my tote bag, that is.
I checked carefully and it didn't get my clothes, and the only bit of me it got was my hand (the hand that was placed on my tote bag).
Yelping, I made my way to the station toilets, swearing "shit shit shit". I felt that at least I should use appropriate language for the moment. Then I tried using the only available accessories (toilet paper, water and soap) to rid my bag of birdy-poo. Oh, and my hand, too.
I missed that train but caught the next and I decided not to regale the recruiter with this amusing story of birdy-droppings at the interview.
However, I have heard the old adage that if a bird chooses to drop its droppings on you, it's good luck! Is this meant to be an omen? Will I get a job with this recruiter? Or does it simply mean I will get no more bird plops?
Or does it mean that my TOTE BAG is to receive the good luck? Will it be a very lucky and fortunate tote bag, that has lots of happiness and longevity in its toting life?
I'm a little confused, but very optimistic!
Monday, 2 November 2009
'Tweaking' (aka lying) on your resume
It's a tough world out there, but someone's got to live in it. Like alive people. And lots of us have to work in it, or try to. But sometimes it's not that easy to find a job, or get into an industry we like, or some people just hate the job we're doing but can't think of a way out. Or some people are just plain lazy. Whatever it is, we have a system where for the most part a resume is a big slice of how to get a job, or even just to get an interview, but is it ever ok to lie on your resume?
Here's a discussion of that very topic.
Some people would say you have to be totally upfront on your resume, some would say it's ok to lie on your resume, and others would point to a middle ground - it's ok to tell white lies, to exaggerate, to 'tweak' a resume, but telling outright lies is just wrong. The problem with this is that where exactly do you draw the line on tweaking? And won't you be mad if you draw the line differently from someone else and that other person gets the job!
In the link above, many of the objections come from someone who wants to outright lie on their resume, and also because the motivation seems to be because he's bludged around a bit, and has decided he wants to lie because he knows a bit about some things, but doesn't have the certificates, and he wants to get a job that "doesn't totally suck" without doing the hard menial yards that most people have to do to get there. His idea is that he will try to walk straight in to a more comfortable position.
Whereas most people either have to do the hard yards either in a university/TAFE, or spend a few years doing low-level crappy work to get their foot in the door. I remember some producer at Channel Nine telling me she got there by taking on a crummy job filing tapes in the library for less than $18 000 a year in order to become a TV producer. And she had to badger them like crazy to get that job.
But is it EVER ok to lie on your resume? The arguments on the forum are that if you lie on your resume, it helps you not because you wouldn't have the skills if you didn't have the qualifications/experience. Others say that if you weren't prepared to work hard to get the qualifications and experience, then you cannot be the kind of person who would work hard to learn on the job, so the "I would work hard to learn on the job" argument is invalid.
But there are certain arguments for tweaking your resume.
Employers are notorious for skimming resumes and jumping to conclusions based on them, and key words leap out at them. What if the job you did recently, if you were to honestly describe it, would not really contain any of those key words, yet you know you gained the requisite skills. It might be easier to use the vague and industry accepted terms just to get your foot in the door, rather than be very honest.
What if an unusual situation occurred on your job that did not majorly affect your career progression, that could either be glossed over or covered up by a white lie, or look awkward on a resume that could put you slightly behind someone who had a more 'conventional' career path, or would take a 500 word exposition to explain that no one would bother to read? Many would choose the 'white lie'.
The trouble is, at what point do you distinguish between the white lie and the dirty big fat black lie? Everyone has their own standard.
If you say you have "lots of customer experience" and you really worked for two weeks in a boring old quirky shop where you might have been lucky to serve one person every two days, and simply took their money and gave them a receipt, is that just "slight embellishment" or a lie?
If you are misleading - for instance - write that you "attended" a course but don't point out that you mean that you turned up for the first half of the first class, but never studied the subject and certainly never passed any of the tests or assignments ... is that a lie?
And what about lies by omission? What if you omit that you have certain qualifications because you don't wish to look overqualified for a position, or interested in other areas of study which may make them think you are a less stable employee?
My resume is edited, embellished and tweaked, I must admit. It is not a bland setting out of my educational and work history to date. But I regard that as a necessity - I just don't know whether my own version is anyone else's "too far".
Here's a discussion of that very topic.
Some people would say you have to be totally upfront on your resume, some would say it's ok to lie on your resume, and others would point to a middle ground - it's ok to tell white lies, to exaggerate, to 'tweak' a resume, but telling outright lies is just wrong. The problem with this is that where exactly do you draw the line on tweaking? And won't you be mad if you draw the line differently from someone else and that other person gets the job!
In the link above, many of the objections come from someone who wants to outright lie on their resume, and also because the motivation seems to be because he's bludged around a bit, and has decided he wants to lie because he knows a bit about some things, but doesn't have the certificates, and he wants to get a job that "doesn't totally suck" without doing the hard menial yards that most people have to do to get there. His idea is that he will try to walk straight in to a more comfortable position.
Whereas most people either have to do the hard yards either in a university/TAFE, or spend a few years doing low-level crappy work to get their foot in the door. I remember some producer at Channel Nine telling me she got there by taking on a crummy job filing tapes in the library for less than $18 000 a year in order to become a TV producer. And she had to badger them like crazy to get that job.
But is it EVER ok to lie on your resume? The arguments on the forum are that if you lie on your resume, it helps you not because you wouldn't have the skills if you didn't have the qualifications/experience. Others say that if you weren't prepared to work hard to get the qualifications and experience, then you cannot be the kind of person who would work hard to learn on the job, so the "I would work hard to learn on the job" argument is invalid.
But there are certain arguments for tweaking your resume.
Employers are notorious for skimming resumes and jumping to conclusions based on them, and key words leap out at them. What if the job you did recently, if you were to honestly describe it, would not really contain any of those key words, yet you know you gained the requisite skills. It might be easier to use the vague and industry accepted terms just to get your foot in the door, rather than be very honest.
What if an unusual situation occurred on your job that did not majorly affect your career progression, that could either be glossed over or covered up by a white lie, or look awkward on a resume that could put you slightly behind someone who had a more 'conventional' career path, or would take a 500 word exposition to explain that no one would bother to read? Many would choose the 'white lie'.
The trouble is, at what point do you distinguish between the white lie and the dirty big fat black lie? Everyone has their own standard.
If you say you have "lots of customer experience" and you really worked for two weeks in a boring old quirky shop where you might have been lucky to serve one person every two days, and simply took their money and gave them a receipt, is that just "slight embellishment" or a lie?
If you are misleading - for instance - write that you "attended" a course but don't point out that you mean that you turned up for the first half of the first class, but never studied the subject and certainly never passed any of the tests or assignments ... is that a lie?
And what about lies by omission? What if you omit that you have certain qualifications because you don't wish to look overqualified for a position, or interested in other areas of study which may make them think you are a less stable employee?
My resume is edited, embellished and tweaked, I must admit. It is not a bland setting out of my educational and work history to date. But I regard that as a necessity - I just don't know whether my own version is anyone else's "too far".
Tuesday, 6 October 2009
Lots of output and no input
And no, this has nothing to do with computer programs.
Recently I tried to make employment a priority. That is, specifically, me trying to become an employed persona, and recently meaning ever since I became an unemployed persona, that is, since mid-June of this year. I will admit that immediately after I lost my last job, I was a bit lax about finding employment, enjoying a week or so off, and a few weeks here and there have been a bit too crammed with other things to do concentrated job hunting. What's more, jobs have been terribly scarce so if you're like me and you try to get your jobs online, even if you try searching the web fairly often sometimes nothing turns up.
NOW maybe someone much smarter, someone more EXPERIENCED, someone more SUCCESSFUL, someone more EFFECTIVE, or someone just who's just got a NUTTIER or WACKIER idea that doesn't involve lifelong damage to the human body (mine or others) or great expense may give me some practical tips on what I could do to possibly land a job, because so far it hasn't been that good. In fact it has been disheartening that I put more time into writing an application than some companies do into reviewing it - the rejection comes back so fast it makes me really annoyed and I feel like sending it back along with their formulaic rejection notice about 'carefully considering' all applications with a sneer and saying 'REVIEW AGAIN YOU COWS!'. Others take so long and never get back to you that you feel like going after them with a cattle prod.
And I'm not sure why all the cow and cattle terminology is coming into play here.
1. Yes I have a resume
2. I have been going for a fair number of different types of jobs. Office jobs, which I am most used to doing, except for that time when I was in High School, where I have some experience in selling hot chips.
I tried calling a recruitment agency, but the lady on the other end of the phone told me politely that recruitment agencies only handled people with quite a deal of experience who also matched the job requirements and I wasn't suitable. I looked miserably at my scatty resume which is a patchwork of a couple of months or weeks or days here and there and it didn't look like any recruitment agent would be jumping for joy to see me. The agent said nicely it would be a very good idea to approach the employer directly.
It seems a lot of emphasis is point on experience in terms of time instead of quality. Really! I mean, I might have only had two days of work at this particular firm, but they were a VERY GOOD two days, I thought, as I tucked in my resume. How shallow can a person be? It's like buying a painting because of its dimensions instead of its artistry or a book because of its length!
Then I remembered how I thought I was getting ripped off in a store recently because a very interesting-looking but slim book was a buck more expensive than a book-I-knew-nothing-about, but the latter had 150 more pages, so maybe hold that thought.
Anyhow, I keep sending enthusiastic-sounding letters to people, telling them that I will type, juggle coffee for them, write reports, file, whatever.
I also assure them that I am excellent at communicating in writing and in speech, that I love working teams and I love working alone too, that I am a workaholic who also will fit into their culture of work-life balance, and I'm a person with great leadership qualities who can take orders and I follow strict processes with lots of flexibility and I have great attention to finer details while obviously focussing on the big picture. All the usual stuff you have to say.
What the heck else do they WANT?
Recently I tried to make employment a priority. That is, specifically, me trying to become an employed persona, and recently meaning ever since I became an unemployed persona, that is, since mid-June of this year. I will admit that immediately after I lost my last job, I was a bit lax about finding employment, enjoying a week or so off, and a few weeks here and there have been a bit too crammed with other things to do concentrated job hunting. What's more, jobs have been terribly scarce so if you're like me and you try to get your jobs online, even if you try searching the web fairly often sometimes nothing turns up.
NOW maybe someone much smarter, someone more EXPERIENCED, someone more SUCCESSFUL, someone more EFFECTIVE, or someone just who's just got a NUTTIER or WACKIER idea that doesn't involve lifelong damage to the human body (mine or others) or great expense may give me some practical tips on what I could do to possibly land a job, because so far it hasn't been that good. In fact it has been disheartening that I put more time into writing an application than some companies do into reviewing it - the rejection comes back so fast it makes me really annoyed and I feel like sending it back along with their formulaic rejection notice about 'carefully considering' all applications with a sneer and saying 'REVIEW AGAIN YOU COWS!'. Others take so long and never get back to you that you feel like going after them with a cattle prod.
And I'm not sure why all the cow and cattle terminology is coming into play here.
1. Yes I have a resume
2. I have been going for a fair number of different types of jobs. Office jobs, which I am most used to doing, except for that time when I was in High School, where I have some experience in selling hot chips.
I tried calling a recruitment agency, but the lady on the other end of the phone told me politely that recruitment agencies only handled people with quite a deal of experience who also matched the job requirements and I wasn't suitable. I looked miserably at my scatty resume which is a patchwork of a couple of months or weeks or days here and there and it didn't look like any recruitment agent would be jumping for joy to see me. The agent said nicely it would be a very good idea to approach the employer directly.
It seems a lot of emphasis is point on experience in terms of time instead of quality. Really! I mean, I might have only had two days of work at this particular firm, but they were a VERY GOOD two days, I thought, as I tucked in my resume. How shallow can a person be? It's like buying a painting because of its dimensions instead of its artistry or a book because of its length!
Then I remembered how I thought I was getting ripped off in a store recently because a very interesting-looking but slim book was a buck more expensive than a book-I-knew-nothing-about, but the latter had 150 more pages, so maybe hold that thought.
Anyhow, I keep sending enthusiastic-sounding letters to people, telling them that I will type, juggle coffee for them, write reports, file, whatever.
I also assure them that I am excellent at communicating in writing and in speech, that I love working teams and I love working alone too, that I am a workaholic who also will fit into their culture of work-life balance, and I'm a person with great leadership qualities who can take orders and I follow strict processes with lots of flexibility and I have great attention to finer details while obviously focussing on the big picture. All the usual stuff you have to say.
What the heck else do they WANT?
Friday, 18 September 2009
A Man's Head on a Woman's Shoulders
Recently I had a rant a bit about racial discrimination, so now I'll switch to the old one, gender discrimination.
I was reading an article in a print newspaper which I unfortunately can't put a link to because they don't seem to have published it online. That's why they make you get the print copy, for gems of 300 words like that.
Anyhow, the writer was telling of how insurance premiums were higher on his car than they were for his wife, even though they both have a clean driving record and are both the same age, and the reason was because he's male. He asked the insurance company and they said this was because men made more claims than women. He asked if they discriminated based on race too, and they said no, because they didn't collect any data on that.
He said this was annoying as gender was one of the things you can't change. Age relates to experience. But you could get older, in fact you usually did. Or you could move to a different geographic region. But you didn't change gender.
Obviously he hasn't investigated certain operations you can do, but never mind.
Anyway, the poor bloke seemed put upon, and this was one of the terrible things about being a bloke. That and I just don't know how men live with a bobbing Adam's Apple. Doesn't it ever feel weird having a round thing bobbing at your neck? It looks weird on some of you. If I had one I would be thinking it was very strange. Especially since I'm a girl.
But I don't think it is all one way. For instance, in some cases, women pay more for just being a woman. For instance, I passed the hairdresser's and a Lady's Basic Cut, the cheapest was, more expensive than the most expensive Men's Basic Cut (they have a slight range based, I think, on length of hair).
Now that is outrageous. I have seen men with tangly long mullets and women with little bob cuts and still the women are probably paying more. Grrr!
In fact it annoys me more than the car premium thing, because I've got hair. I don't have a car. Your hair grows on you, man. You need to CUT IT to get rid of it, ok some people's just falls out. Whereas if you don't want to pay for insurance on a car you can choose to not buy one in the first place. Easy peasy. So in that way I think it is even WORSE.
I have thought sometimes that I should go into a hairdresser dressed in a suit and tie with a m moustache drawn on my face and talk in a deep voice and despite having past-the-shoulder length hair and wanting a side part with it nicely layered etc, I would demand bravely to have a men's cut! See if they would dare question my ... errrh ... balls!
They've changed it now - And now it is happily gender-unbiased - but they used to have two different specials at the Belgian Beer Cafe - one was half-price mussels for males on Wednesdays, and for ladies it was a free beer if you wore red. (They've changed it now so the mussels deal applies to everyone and the beer special has disappeared.)
But at the time it annoyed me because I don't drink beer and I like mussels! And dammit ... What do I have in my wardrobe that's red? Too much planning!
On the other time of course one uses the feminine advantage to every extent they can when the guys who are selling fruit at Paddy's Markets make their comments about throwing in an extra few apples into your basket "for the lady".
I'm not sure if we should jump up and scream about all this disgusting, awful, gender discrimination, or accept it will balance out in the end, and/or accept which gender we are and what tricks and advantages it gives us and use them to gain the best advantages where! It sounds pathetic and very cliche but I do think some people might help me more because I'm a pint-sized female, if something falls, if a stupid ticket machine won't work and I start growling at it I think there is someone who is male/taller/wider/more authoritarian looking who delights in coming up and trying to help out, more so than if I were a big tall, large male with tattoos all over me.
Of course there are some areas in which gender discrimination/abuse/unfairness is quite serious; on the other hand when it comes to a little freebie given or not given here or there, a small slant in prices, a slightly different treatment, should it be something we worry about overly?
Or is not worrying about them being lazy, and silently condoning or making way for the bigger abuses, or contributing to them? Is that person whom you let get away with dividing man's chores and girl's chores and you don't mind her emphasising it because you'd really rather not clean the car or put the mulch on the garden or re-tile the roof ... is she the next one who'll be giving disgustingly different pay to males from females or refusing to employ certain people based on gender and part of that is your fault?
And you could be one of those victims!
Hmmmm.
I was reading an article in a print newspaper which I unfortunately can't put a link to because they don't seem to have published it online. That's why they make you get the print copy, for gems of 300 words like that.
Anyhow, the writer was telling of how insurance premiums were higher on his car than they were for his wife, even though they both have a clean driving record and are both the same age, and the reason was because he's male. He asked the insurance company and they said this was because men made more claims than women. He asked if they discriminated based on race too, and they said no, because they didn't collect any data on that.
He said this was annoying as gender was one of the things you can't change. Age relates to experience. But you could get older, in fact you usually did. Or you could move to a different geographic region. But you didn't change gender.
Obviously he hasn't investigated certain operations you can do, but never mind.
Anyway, the poor bloke seemed put upon, and this was one of the terrible things about being a bloke. That and I just don't know how men live with a bobbing Adam's Apple. Doesn't it ever feel weird having a round thing bobbing at your neck? It looks weird on some of you. If I had one I would be thinking it was very strange. Especially since I'm a girl.
But I don't think it is all one way. For instance, in some cases, women pay more for just being a woman. For instance, I passed the hairdresser's and a Lady's Basic Cut, the cheapest was, more expensive than the most expensive Men's Basic Cut (they have a slight range based, I think, on length of hair).
Now that is outrageous. I have seen men with tangly long mullets and women with little bob cuts and still the women are probably paying more. Grrr!
In fact it annoys me more than the car premium thing, because I've got hair. I don't have a car. Your hair grows on you, man. You need to CUT IT to get rid of it, ok some people's just falls out. Whereas if you don't want to pay for insurance on a car you can choose to not buy one in the first place. Easy peasy. So in that way I think it is even WORSE.
I have thought sometimes that I should go into a hairdresser dressed in a suit and tie with a m moustache drawn on my face and talk in a deep voice and despite having past-the-shoulder length hair and wanting a side part with it nicely layered etc, I would demand bravely to have a men's cut! See if they would dare question my ... errrh ... balls!
They've changed it now - And now it is happily gender-unbiased - but they used to have two different specials at the Belgian Beer Cafe - one was half-price mussels for males on Wednesdays, and for ladies it was a free beer if you wore red. (They've changed it now so the mussels deal applies to everyone and the beer special has disappeared.)
But at the time it annoyed me because I don't drink beer and I like mussels! And dammit ... What do I have in my wardrobe that's red? Too much planning!
On the other time of course one uses the feminine advantage to every extent they can when the guys who are selling fruit at Paddy's Markets make their comments about throwing in an extra few apples into your basket "for the lady".
I'm not sure if we should jump up and scream about all this disgusting, awful, gender discrimination, or accept it will balance out in the end, and/or accept which gender we are and what tricks and advantages it gives us and use them to gain the best advantages where! It sounds pathetic and very cliche but I do think some people might help me more because I'm a pint-sized female, if something falls, if a stupid ticket machine won't work and I start growling at it I think there is someone who is male/taller/wider/more authoritarian looking who delights in coming up and trying to help out, more so than if I were a big tall, large male with tattoos all over me.
Of course there are some areas in which gender discrimination/abuse/unfairness is quite serious; on the other hand when it comes to a little freebie given or not given here or there, a small slant in prices, a slightly different treatment, should it be something we worry about overly?
Or is not worrying about them being lazy, and silently condoning or making way for the bigger abuses, or contributing to them? Is that person whom you let get away with dividing man's chores and girl's chores and you don't mind her emphasising it because you'd really rather not clean the car or put the mulch on the garden or re-tile the roof ... is she the next one who'll be giving disgustingly different pay to males from females or refusing to employ certain people based on gender and part of that is your fault?
And you could be one of those victims!
Hmmmm.
Monday, 7 September 2009
My Aspiration to Work at Google
Recently someone started in on me about how cool it was to work at Google and what a great work culture they have there.
I have no doubt that this could be true, but I'm not sure what use they'd have for a once-paralegal whose ambition is to write a really cool book about witches.
I did think about working for Google, and what possible skills I would have to offer such an organisation, and there is about only one thing I could think of.
I think would like, and would be good at, coming up with different ways to write "Google". You know, the way the Google logo changes. Sometimes the two "o"s look like eyes or something. But I reckon I could come up with some really creative ones. One could be a blue eye and one could be a green eye!
That's called INNOVATIVE.
I'm sure someone is in charge of that, it doesn't just change by itself. In fact there is a bit of a fuss over the second "o" now so it's not like this logo changing means nothing.
I, in fact, envisage a whole team of about 6 people whose job it is to come up with different ways to write "Google". One in charge of each letter.
One who walks around saying "I'm the "first "o" man" and another saying "I'm the "l" lady!". That would be their title. Their day would be filled with nothing but "o"s or "G"s or whatever letter they would be assigned.
Wow. It's just a great idea. I think I could do that. I don't know, I think an "o" would suit me fine, but really, I'm just happy to be part of the team. I'll take any letter. Really.
I have no doubt that this could be true, but I'm not sure what use they'd have for a once-paralegal whose ambition is to write a really cool book about witches.
I did think about working for Google, and what possible skills I would have to offer such an organisation, and there is about only one thing I could think of.
I think would like, and would be good at, coming up with different ways to write "Google". You know, the way the Google logo changes. Sometimes the two "o"s look like eyes or something. But I reckon I could come up with some really creative ones. One could be a blue eye and one could be a green eye!
That's called INNOVATIVE.
I'm sure someone is in charge of that, it doesn't just change by itself. In fact there is a bit of a fuss over the second "o" now so it's not like this logo changing means nothing.
I, in fact, envisage a whole team of about 6 people whose job it is to come up with different ways to write "Google". One in charge of each letter.
One who walks around saying "I'm the "first "o" man" and another saying "I'm the "l" lady!". That would be their title. Their day would be filled with nothing but "o"s or "G"s or whatever letter they would be assigned.
Wow. It's just a great idea. I think I could do that. I don't know, I think an "o" would suit me fine, but really, I'm just happy to be part of the team. I'll take any letter. Really.
Monday, 24 August 2009
Begging, the Dole, or an Honest Day's Work?
In the Daily Tele just the other day, there was this story about a guy who can earn $400 a day begging. Apparently he's not the only one. Slow days are when he clears about $75 or $150, but he's "disappointed" when he clears only $250. That's his standard.
He says he puts it in a bank account and he's saving for a friend who needs a liver transplant.
Now this story provoked outrage, plenty of people answered with declarations that they weren't going to pay the guy another cent, he was a leech and an idiot and he should get a job and why couldn't he pay rent and get off the streets.
My guess is many people were so mad because they felt they have been conned by him or others like him before, and they're mad because they don't clear money like that by what they think is 'easy money'. Though if you think sitting in shabby clothes on your bum in the street is fun, I'd think again.
And if you think it's easy money sitting around for 16 hours doing nothing ... well I can assure you it's not. My last job at the Industrial Relations Commission involved me sitting around doing nothing for long periods. I found it physically taxing and I wasn't earning $400 a day. I resigned and have less income than even there but it's a relief to be out of the sitting-on-butt business. Truly - sitting around all day isn't that great! I couldn't do it myself.
Others expressed the view that the guy should be paying tax, or that 'at least it was better than going on the dole'.
Anyhow, I don't know about tax, because if you're just giving him a bit of a donation, I don't know about that. Either way I wouldn't be paying tax if I could avoid it. I wonder if he has evaded birth and death too?
As for the guy being a leech on society, it seems that many people have forgotten that begging means that you choose to give someone something - albeit for nothing, or some might say, because they have inspired you or injected you with a feeling. It's a vague contract you make with them except they use guilt as a lever and don't give anything back that's solid except relief of that guilt. Or maybe self-image, or whatever.
Cake-sellers give you a cake in exchange for your bucks, but beggars just make you feel like you've done the right thing. Neither forces you to give anything. If you want them to die on the streets (or go bankrupt, whatever) just let them alone!
The last comparisons were the comparison of begging to the dole and to an 'honest job'. Not surprisingly, most people thought it was better for a person to 'get a job' than beg, not for his own sake but as if it were obligatory for him to do so. Many said it was 'good he wasn't on the dole' but some also talked about 'poor pensioners' who were taken in by his crap ... so there seemed to be a discrimination between pensioners and those on the dole (or different people feeling very differently about those on welfare, with the dole having bad connotations, but pensioners not having such a bad connotation. It's a lesson as to how to describe yourself if you're on welfare.)
It's also a lesson as to how to describe yourself if you've got a job. Remember, it's an honest job.
I'm not exactly sure what the heck a DIS honest job is. Professional liar? Working in advertising and political speech writing?
Anyhow, while we can parade our honest jobs, or some people can, I'm not exactly so sure why it's so great to have an honest job rather than to beg. Apart from the fact that you are obliged to pay taxes.
In both cases, someone agrees to pay you money. And when you think about it, some so-called honest jobs are pretty useless in function. Probably as useless as if you sat on your bum in the street. It's one of the reasons I've been disillusioned about many of the jobs I've read about, I feel like I am going to file files in a drawer that noone is ever going to look at again, shuffle paper off in a drawer that won't be seen again, pass paper to Mr B from Ms A which could have been passed directly from A to B if they had taken two seconds longer to do it, blah blah. It's boring boring crap!!!!!!!!
zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz!
And yet that is what a lot of clerk like jobs are like, in my head I reason the main difference between them and not doing the job and letting the office run itself is someone actually pays you if you agree to do it. I didn't exactly feel like I was contributing to society at all. I just felt like someone thought I was.* And that was the reason to do the job.
Oh and someone will say you have an honest job and you are not a bludger.
So is the distasteful thing about people on the dole and begging is that they are collecting money and not only are they not doing anything but they also have been found out that they aren't doing anything?
As for begging and not being a dole bludger, basically, what's so great about saying at least you are not one but you are the other?
When you beg you play on someone's conscience or their image or their feeling of obligation or whatever. Many would call it a con. However, it depends on the day as to how much you are likely to get, and no one is obliged to give you a cent. There is however no cap on your limit, and you make a direct 'contract' with your contributors.
With a dole your claim is made to the State, not individuals in the street, and it's based on principles that assumedly Society agrees to/regulations that we agree to be governed under. And everyone's entitled to claim, but you have to make a disclosure under them and your receivable amount is capped.
Is it so much more principled to try one and not the other, and which one? I guess it depends on your principles.
*By the way I write this believing that many people who go on about their honest jobs do boring jobs that have very little impact on the world, like mine. On the other hand there are people whose jobs do have an impact on other people and if they don't turn up to work everyone gets frantic, or if they hadn't done their job ever, we'd be living in a world made of Stilton Cheese Towers and sipping funny green mucous speaking in beeps. Those people we have to thank for making the world we live in today possible. Not that a cheese tower wouldn't be interesting, for a holiday anyhow.
He says he puts it in a bank account and he's saving for a friend who needs a liver transplant.
Now this story provoked outrage, plenty of people answered with declarations that they weren't going to pay the guy another cent, he was a leech and an idiot and he should get a job and why couldn't he pay rent and get off the streets.
My guess is many people were so mad because they felt they have been conned by him or others like him before, and they're mad because they don't clear money like that by what they think is 'easy money'. Though if you think sitting in shabby clothes on your bum in the street is fun, I'd think again.
And if you think it's easy money sitting around for 16 hours doing nothing ... well I can assure you it's not. My last job at the Industrial Relations Commission involved me sitting around doing nothing for long periods. I found it physically taxing and I wasn't earning $400 a day. I resigned and have less income than even there but it's a relief to be out of the sitting-on-butt business. Truly - sitting around all day isn't that great! I couldn't do it myself.
Others expressed the view that the guy should be paying tax, or that 'at least it was better than going on the dole'.
Anyhow, I don't know about tax, because if you're just giving him a bit of a donation, I don't know about that. Either way I wouldn't be paying tax if I could avoid it. I wonder if he has evaded birth and death too?
As for the guy being a leech on society, it seems that many people have forgotten that begging means that you choose to give someone something - albeit for nothing, or some might say, because they have inspired you or injected you with a feeling. It's a vague contract you make with them except they use guilt as a lever and don't give anything back that's solid except relief of that guilt. Or maybe self-image, or whatever.
Cake-sellers give you a cake in exchange for your bucks, but beggars just make you feel like you've done the right thing. Neither forces you to give anything. If you want them to die on the streets (or go bankrupt, whatever) just let them alone!
The last comparisons were the comparison of begging to the dole and to an 'honest job'. Not surprisingly, most people thought it was better for a person to 'get a job' than beg, not for his own sake but as if it were obligatory for him to do so. Many said it was 'good he wasn't on the dole' but some also talked about 'poor pensioners' who were taken in by his crap ... so there seemed to be a discrimination between pensioners and those on the dole (or different people feeling very differently about those on welfare, with the dole having bad connotations, but pensioners not having such a bad connotation. It's a lesson as to how to describe yourself if you're on welfare.)
It's also a lesson as to how to describe yourself if you've got a job. Remember, it's an honest job.
I'm not exactly sure what the heck a DIS honest job is. Professional liar? Working in advertising and political speech writing?
Anyhow, while we can parade our honest jobs, or some people can, I'm not exactly so sure why it's so great to have an honest job rather than to beg. Apart from the fact that you are obliged to pay taxes.
In both cases, someone agrees to pay you money. And when you think about it, some so-called honest jobs are pretty useless in function. Probably as useless as if you sat on your bum in the street. It's one of the reasons I've been disillusioned about many of the jobs I've read about, I feel like I am going to file files in a drawer that noone is ever going to look at again, shuffle paper off in a drawer that won't be seen again, pass paper to Mr B from Ms A which could have been passed directly from A to B if they had taken two seconds longer to do it, blah blah. It's boring boring crap!!!!!!!!
zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz!
And yet that is what a lot of clerk like jobs are like, in my head I reason the main difference between them and not doing the job and letting the office run itself is someone actually pays you if you agree to do it. I didn't exactly feel like I was contributing to society at all. I just felt like someone thought I was.* And that was the reason to do the job.
Oh and someone will say you have an honest job and you are not a bludger.
So is the distasteful thing about people on the dole and begging is that they are collecting money and not only are they not doing anything but they also have been found out that they aren't doing anything?
As for begging and not being a dole bludger, basically, what's so great about saying at least you are not one but you are the other?
When you beg you play on someone's conscience or their image or their feeling of obligation or whatever. Many would call it a con. However, it depends on the day as to how much you are likely to get, and no one is obliged to give you a cent. There is however no cap on your limit, and you make a direct 'contract' with your contributors.
With a dole your claim is made to the State, not individuals in the street, and it's based on principles that assumedly Society agrees to/regulations that we agree to be governed under. And everyone's entitled to claim, but you have to make a disclosure under them and your receivable amount is capped.
Is it so much more principled to try one and not the other, and which one? I guess it depends on your principles.
*By the way I write this believing that many people who go on about their honest jobs do boring jobs that have very little impact on the world, like mine. On the other hand there are people whose jobs do have an impact on other people and if they don't turn up to work everyone gets frantic, or if they hadn't done their job ever, we'd be living in a world made of Stilton Cheese Towers and sipping funny green mucous speaking in beeps. Those people we have to thank for making the world we live in today possible. Not that a cheese tower wouldn't be interesting, for a holiday anyhow.
Saturday, 15 August 2009
6 tiny cups of full cream milk in every 3rd of a cup ...
Mum has this problem at work - there aren't many employees, and that makes it difficult to have milk at work without it all going to waste. Specially as Mum only likes a small amount of milk in her tea, once a day, and the creamier the milk the less the amount. If it's the skim or Shape milk she can take a tiny more but if it's cream just the slightest, and it's the cream that you can generally buy a bit more flexibly in terms of amounts.
Anyhow, Mum hit on this idea to buy a crateful of 200 individual serves of milk. You know, those tiny little serves of milk which are sealed at the top and are in plastic containers. You have to buy minimum 200 at a time. Mum agreed to share them with the one other employee at the work - the boss just wasn't interested. by Mum's calculation, if they each had one tea/coffee per day, that would mean they'd all be gone by the expiry date, except 40 serves, which could account for the few days they might have two cups. Or they could risk wasting 40 tiny little serves.
Mum has three weeks to go and she has brought home a HUGE number of little containers. Apparently the other colleague hasn't been keeping his end of the deal too well, the little containers were too fiddly so he just went off and bought himself a coffee with milk all the time and stopped using the containers. Mum's carted home a big supply of milk and ordered us to try to use it up before the use by date. if we have a coffee or a tea, please use a container. Please.
But there's so much there it's a tough ask and dad got in trouble the other night for sticking milk from the bottle into his tea instead of that from the container.
Mum made some little cakes today and topped it up with milk from containers.
I had a third glass of milk today at lunch just for the heck of it and stuck in 6 tiny little sachets. What the heck.
Maybe we'll get through it. It just takes determination.
Anyhow, Mum hit on this idea to buy a crateful of 200 individual serves of milk. You know, those tiny little serves of milk which are sealed at the top and are in plastic containers. You have to buy minimum 200 at a time. Mum agreed to share them with the one other employee at the work - the boss just wasn't interested. by Mum's calculation, if they each had one tea/coffee per day, that would mean they'd all be gone by the expiry date, except 40 serves, which could account for the few days they might have two cups. Or they could risk wasting 40 tiny little serves.
Mum has three weeks to go and she has brought home a HUGE number of little containers. Apparently the other colleague hasn't been keeping his end of the deal too well, the little containers were too fiddly so he just went off and bought himself a coffee with milk all the time and stopped using the containers. Mum's carted home a big supply of milk and ordered us to try to use it up before the use by date. if we have a coffee or a tea, please use a container. Please.
But there's so much there it's a tough ask and dad got in trouble the other night for sticking milk from the bottle into his tea instead of that from the container.
Mum made some little cakes today and topped it up with milk from containers.
I had a third glass of milk today at lunch just for the heck of it and stuck in 6 tiny little sachets. What the heck.
Maybe we'll get through it. It just takes determination.
See, everyone, I don't have a life
I read an article in this weekend's Sydney Morning Herald called See everyone, I do have a life by Hilda Qiroga.
It was about the clutter and little trinkets and photos and things that people put on their desks at work - you know, plants, toys, photos. probably you have an assortment of stuff, whatever you choose.
Ms Qiroga went at length to discuss obvious favourites, such as pictures of loved ones and people posing with celebs or on holiday, and said looking at desk adornments said a lot about a person. "You will discover who they love, what they love, hobbies, political leanings, hopes and aspirations". Then she started to theorise why people do this - do they want to show off that they actually have a life to other colleagues? Or does it make them feel warm and fuzzy just to be near the things you love? And as she pointed out, whichever it is, it's standard practice to have stuff on your desk and you are meant to comment.
On the other hand there are people who choose not to decorate, and Ms Qiroga's tone seemed not to be nearly as 'nice' towards these! While they could be those who just are there to work, and she does theorise that perhaps these people work harder because they aren't distracted and only work - well, it didn't seem like this was something you should admire in them, from the way the article was written, but more like, who is this freak? But then, they aren't the norm, so I guess they would be a freak. She suggested that perhaps they live to work, perhaps they have no time to put up anything, or they have no life outside work. or maybe they are so smug they have no need to display 'annoying snaps' to people in the office. "So smug and self-confident are they, so private and mysterious, they have no need to reassure you that, yes I have a life".
(This leaves out those who might have a work policy against happy snaps. I don't know about any office that has a work policy which says you HAVE to have a goofy pic of yourself on the wall but that could be interesting.)
Anyhow, what type are you?
Personally, I'm one of the no-mess types, one of the freaks, but Ms Qiroga hasn't quite nailed my motivations. Yes, I prefer the lack of mess on the desk because it does get a bit in the way. Also I don't feel the need to show everyone pics of myself. I look terrible in photos anyhow, I don't travel and I don't have celebrities I've met. In fact I can't think of one interesting picture I have of me. I don't even like my graduation pictures. And I just think it's plain stupid to put your passport photo on the wall, it's like having a mug shot there.
One of the things that I don't like about pics and trinkets is a) people do start commenting on them and b) they start touching them. I have trinkets on my desk at home. I'm not too fond of the idea of bringing in something made of glass and somebody says "Hey this looks interesting" and picks it up and then whoops, they've dropped it and now you have shards all over your desk to clean up, and I'll bet you they don't pay for it either. And the fact that they start commenting on them isn't a huge plus to me because hey - see the post on jobs below - I took the personality test and I am a SIT IN THE HOLE AND DON'T DISTURB ME type.
My motivation is I'm an antisocial freak moreso than a smug and self-confident freak.
Other reasons I have never been eager to bring in stuff to work is:
a) paranoia that the cleaner would steal anything valuable
b) If you put all this stuff on your desk at work what it really means is you have to remove it all when you get sacked or resign which with me, is a good chance it will be within a few weeks. I keep it at home, I have had my own bedroom for years and it's less hassle. When I resigned from the last job it was a relief that I had very little to organise to move.
When my brother was made redundant from his last job they wouldn't even let him return to his job for security reasons so they cleaned his desk for him and returned by mail all what they considered to be 'personal belongings' - that is, stuffed them in an old cardboard box and got an Aussie Post Courier to dump them outside our house when noone was home. This included valuables like an iPhone. I find this pretty irresponsible and wouldn't want complete strangers doing that for me - just say they missed something nice or crapped it up?
antisocial, paranoid, and not very good at staying employed freak.
Anyhow, what that really says to me is "don't take anything to work and leave it there that you actually like". And then I think if I don't like it, why do I want it on my desk at all?
Then I end up with nothing, except a novel to read during lunch which I take home with me each day so I can keep reading it on the train and bus home.
Life Outside Work
By the way I guess I don't really try to convince anyone that I have a life outside work but I would say this is a lack of imagination rather than smugness. I tend to say "errrrh nothing really" when anyone says what have I been doing on the weekend. What do others do that's exceiting on weekends that's worth saying, does "Yes I had a most exciting weekend, I woke up on Saturday, read the paper, moved my bowels, searched the fridge for leftovers, searched every channel for something to eat, picked at the fridge again, had a shower, tried the fridge yet again, tried the papers again, played Solitaire for several hours ...." well you get the picture. that tends to be what some of my most exciting bummy weekends might end up sounding like.
Perhaps I should have some made up stories - you know those 'lies for the general good of everyone' tucked up my sleeve.
"Oh everyone, I had a smashing weekend! I had my first ride in a rocket ship, I discovered a new species on Venus, I'm naming it after my mother who inspired me to become an astronaut, on the way back we almost ran out of fuel but I was rescued by a very handsome creature from another galaxy who time-hopped into our Solar System and is actually several million years ahead of us time, and when I got back to Earth I decided to splurge on a facial, get a tattoo and start a new cult!"
I'd better have a few of those. The next one can be something about how I took over a small country and learned how to communicate with hamsters using nose-wiggles. Or something.
It was about the clutter and little trinkets and photos and things that people put on their desks at work - you know, plants, toys, photos. probably you have an assortment of stuff, whatever you choose.
Ms Qiroga went at length to discuss obvious favourites, such as pictures of loved ones and people posing with celebs or on holiday, and said looking at desk adornments said a lot about a person. "You will discover who they love, what they love, hobbies, political leanings, hopes and aspirations". Then she started to theorise why people do this - do they want to show off that they actually have a life to other colleagues? Or does it make them feel warm and fuzzy just to be near the things you love? And as she pointed out, whichever it is, it's standard practice to have stuff on your desk and you are meant to comment.
On the other hand there are people who choose not to decorate, and Ms Qiroga's tone seemed not to be nearly as 'nice' towards these! While they could be those who just are there to work, and she does theorise that perhaps these people work harder because they aren't distracted and only work - well, it didn't seem like this was something you should admire in them, from the way the article was written, but more like, who is this freak? But then, they aren't the norm, so I guess they would be a freak. She suggested that perhaps they live to work, perhaps they have no time to put up anything, or they have no life outside work. or maybe they are so smug they have no need to display 'annoying snaps' to people in the office. "So smug and self-confident are they, so private and mysterious, they have no need to reassure you that, yes I have a life".
(This leaves out those who might have a work policy against happy snaps. I don't know about any office that has a work policy which says you HAVE to have a goofy pic of yourself on the wall but that could be interesting.)
Anyhow, what type are you?
Personally, I'm one of the no-mess types, one of the freaks, but Ms Qiroga hasn't quite nailed my motivations. Yes, I prefer the lack of mess on the desk because it does get a bit in the way. Also I don't feel the need to show everyone pics of myself. I look terrible in photos anyhow, I don't travel and I don't have celebrities I've met. In fact I can't think of one interesting picture I have of me. I don't even like my graduation pictures. And I just think it's plain stupid to put your passport photo on the wall, it's like having a mug shot there.
One of the things that I don't like about pics and trinkets is a) people do start commenting on them and b) they start touching them. I have trinkets on my desk at home. I'm not too fond of the idea of bringing in something made of glass and somebody says "Hey this looks interesting" and picks it up and then whoops, they've dropped it and now you have shards all over your desk to clean up, and I'll bet you they don't pay for it either. And the fact that they start commenting on them isn't a huge plus to me because hey - see the post on jobs below - I took the personality test and I am a SIT IN THE HOLE AND DON'T DISTURB ME type.
My motivation is I'm an antisocial freak moreso than a smug and self-confident freak.
Other reasons I have never been eager to bring in stuff to work is:
a) paranoia that the cleaner would steal anything valuable
b) If you put all this stuff on your desk at work what it really means is you have to remove it all when you get sacked or resign which with me, is a good chance it will be within a few weeks. I keep it at home, I have had my own bedroom for years and it's less hassle. When I resigned from the last job it was a relief that I had very little to organise to move.
When my brother was made redundant from his last job they wouldn't even let him return to his job for security reasons so they cleaned his desk for him and returned by mail all what they considered to be 'personal belongings' - that is, stuffed them in an old cardboard box and got an Aussie Post Courier to dump them outside our house when noone was home. This included valuables like an iPhone. I find this pretty irresponsible and wouldn't want complete strangers doing that for me - just say they missed something nice or crapped it up?
antisocial, paranoid, and not very good at staying employed freak.
Anyhow, what that really says to me is "don't take anything to work and leave it there that you actually like". And then I think if I don't like it, why do I want it on my desk at all?
Then I end up with nothing, except a novel to read during lunch which I take home with me each day so I can keep reading it on the train and bus home.
Life Outside Work
By the way I guess I don't really try to convince anyone that I have a life outside work but I would say this is a lack of imagination rather than smugness. I tend to say "errrrh nothing really" when anyone says what have I been doing on the weekend. What do others do that's exceiting on weekends that's worth saying, does "Yes I had a most exciting weekend, I woke up on Saturday, read the paper, moved my bowels, searched the fridge for leftovers, searched every channel for something to eat, picked at the fridge again, had a shower, tried the fridge yet again, tried the papers again, played Solitaire for several hours ...." well you get the picture. that tends to be what some of my most exciting bummy weekends might end up sounding like.
Perhaps I should have some made up stories - you know those 'lies for the general good of everyone' tucked up my sleeve.
"Oh everyone, I had a smashing weekend! I had my first ride in a rocket ship, I discovered a new species on Venus, I'm naming it after my mother who inspired me to become an astronaut, on the way back we almost ran out of fuel but I was rescued by a very handsome creature from another galaxy who time-hopped into our Solar System and is actually several million years ahead of us time, and when I got back to Earth I decided to splurge on a facial, get a tattoo and start a new cult!"
I'd better have a few of those. The next one can be something about how I took over a small country and learned how to communicate with hamsters using nose-wiggles. Or something.
Wednesday, 12 August 2009
Gulp!
I applied for a job yesterday, online.
I pressed the button the website and it led me to a form where I filled in a couple of basic details and then it said to submit my resume.
That's it. No personality test, no references, no academic transcript, no background check and no need for a drivelly cover letter where I go on predictably about my excellent communication skills, my love for working in a team, my ability to prioritise and multitask and handle high pressure environments and my ability to work BOTH independently and in a group and my great computer and office skills.
Now I should have been glad not to have to go through all that predictable crap per usual but for some reason without it I felt lost! I sat there for a few moments and thought "HEEEEEEEEEELP!"
Then I had to remind myself, "Hey, this is a good thing!" and remember to attach my resume and submit!
I pressed the button the website and it led me to a form where I filled in a couple of basic details and then it said to submit my resume.
That's it. No personality test, no references, no academic transcript, no background check and no need for a drivelly cover letter where I go on predictably about my excellent communication skills, my love for working in a team, my ability to prioritise and multitask and handle high pressure environments and my ability to work BOTH independently and in a group and my great computer and office skills.
Now I should have been glad not to have to go through all that predictable crap per usual but for some reason without it I felt lost! I sat there for a few moments and thought "HEEEEEEEEEELP!"
Then I had to remind myself, "Hey, this is a good thing!" and remember to attach my resume and submit!
Tuesday, 11 August 2009
Ode to a Blank Keyboard!
TimT of WillTypeForFood fame was so moved by my blank keyboard dream that he penned a poem in honour of it, and I'm honoured to blog it, right here ... oh you've outdone yourself this time, TimT!
Did I dream? Did I work? Was I dreaming of work?
I sat down to type but the keyboard was bare.
The subconscious is really a bit of a jerk:
I searched for the letters: I searched everywhere.
I searched high and low; I searched here and there:
Was this a design fault? Some curious quirk?
The letters weren’t there. They weren’t anywhere –
Did I dream? Did I work? Was I dreaming of work?
Just what did it mean, this niggle, this irk?
I tried to start working, but I could just stare
Down into my mind, the dim, dark and mirk –
I sat down to type but the keyboard was bare.
I picked up the phone. I needed to share
My problem with IT. I spoke to a clerk
Who knew of my problem – was already aware.
The subconscious is really a bit of a jerk.
Just who was this clerk, and why did they lurk
In the gloomy dim depths of my cortex – somewhere?
Just to think of these questions could drive you berserk.
I searched for the letters. They weren’t anywhere.
And why dream of work, instead of some perk
Like chocolate or champagne? It just isn’t fair.
When I sit down to work, my mind often shirks
And daydreams of buttercups. Does it even care?
Did I dream? Did I work?
Did I dream? Did I work? Was I dreaming of work?
I sat down to type but the keyboard was bare.
The subconscious is really a bit of a jerk:
I searched for the letters: I searched everywhere.
I searched high and low; I searched here and there:
Was this a design fault? Some curious quirk?
The letters weren’t there. They weren’t anywhere –
Did I dream? Did I work? Was I dreaming of work?
Just what did it mean, this niggle, this irk?
I tried to start working, but I could just stare
Down into my mind, the dim, dark and mirk –
I sat down to type but the keyboard was bare.
I picked up the phone. I needed to share
My problem with IT. I spoke to a clerk
Who knew of my problem – was already aware.
The subconscious is really a bit of a jerk.
Just who was this clerk, and why did they lurk
In the gloomy dim depths of my cortex – somewhere?
Just to think of these questions could drive you berserk.
I searched for the letters. They weren’t anywhere.
And why dream of work, instead of some perk
Like chocolate or champagne? It just isn’t fair.
When I sit down to work, my mind often shirks
And daydreams of buttercups. Does it even care?
Did I dream? Did I work?
Who's to blame?
Every so often you hear the government telling people to get out there and get more enthusiastic about finding a job, and maybe don't be so picky, we all have to do our bit, we can't be so picky in these times blah blah. Of course they want us to do any old job, unemployment is bad for stats which reflect upon them.
And (certain) employed people often tell unemployed people to get off their butts and get cracking and find a job, any job, you can't wait around to find a dream job. (It's more rare for an unemployed person to go on like this to other unemployed people.)
But while the onus mainly falls on unemployed people to change the state of unemployment in Australia (that is, make unemployment lower, not greater), let's have a look at who else could be helping out here. I think we can point our finger at many who are just not helping and they aren't us unemployed people:
1. The employed, in fact the OVER-employed
Working hard? Earning good money? You disgust us. While you pontificate about how unemployed people should be getting jobs, every time you work overtime or multitask, think about how you are taking a job away from an innocent unemployed bum who could be earning a slice of your salary. Are you writing an email while talking on the phone and does it cut into your designated lunch break? Do you think about how to manage that project while you are pressing the buttons on the photocopier?
Shame on you.
2. Animals
There's always a whinge about how immigrants take the jobs of hardworking Australians, but what about animals who take the jobs of potentially hardworking humans?
Every time you train a horse, or get a guide dog, or run a rat through a maze, that's something a human could do. Probably pretty well, though maybe a little slower at first, and not look as cute. But we have to make allowances.
3. Employers and their silly, self-indulgent ads
Really, how about writing ads that actually sound attractive for once and say something about the job? So we can apply? I am very sick of reading an ad that's a page long and goes on about this globally recognised company and then when you get to the bottom of the ad you realise it said nothing about the job position. Damn, am I going for CEO or sandwich trolley lady? I wouldn't have a clue. Do I write about how darn cool I look in a suit and what fantastic leadership skills I have and how great I am at wooing Japanese businessmen, or how great I am with slapping turkey and lettuce between slices of rye?
It's a mystery.
Every time someone puts out one of these ads it's seriously a waste of time for the whole economy because unemployed people waste their time reading it and trying to figure it out, possibly waste their time writing a misguided application for it which gets nowhere, when they could have been applying for ones in line with their skills and getting a job.
4. Recruitment Agencies who put out Sham Ads
Frustrating and again a waste of people's time and money. You know who I'm talking about, Gemteq Executive.
5. Recruitment Websites/Agencies who File Ads Improperly (or their filters don't work)
It seems some people have worked the filters so their ad appears everywhere, and filters don't filter it out. So their luscious ad for being a Manager for Whoop Whoop company needing a degree in Engineering and five years experience, based in Perth appears even if you put on the filter NSW - Sydney - West and want only Media - Performance jobs or something.
Yeah, sure, you want your job out there, but the reason people put these filters on is because when they say Sydney, they are not interested in Perth. At ALL. So you're wasting your time, annoying people and making everyone's search slower and more difficult. Pains in the Asses.
6. People who don't yank the ad and the position has been filled 3 months ago.
I can forgive a delay of a couple of days, things are busy and your newbie has been occupying your time. But it is very annoying and another waste of time to have an ad sitting on a website (or anywhere) saying you want someone, and then you go to all the trouble of applying and find out that the position was filled - over a month ago. Thanks a lot.
And (certain) employed people often tell unemployed people to get off their butts and get cracking and find a job, any job, you can't wait around to find a dream job. (It's more rare for an unemployed person to go on like this to other unemployed people.)
But while the onus mainly falls on unemployed people to change the state of unemployment in Australia (that is, make unemployment lower, not greater), let's have a look at who else could be helping out here. I think we can point our finger at many who are just not helping and they aren't us unemployed people:
1. The employed, in fact the OVER-employed
Working hard? Earning good money? You disgust us. While you pontificate about how unemployed people should be getting jobs, every time you work overtime or multitask, think about how you are taking a job away from an innocent unemployed bum who could be earning a slice of your salary. Are you writing an email while talking on the phone and does it cut into your designated lunch break? Do you think about how to manage that project while you are pressing the buttons on the photocopier?
Shame on you.
2. Animals
There's always a whinge about how immigrants take the jobs of hardworking Australians, but what about animals who take the jobs of potentially hardworking humans?
Every time you train a horse, or get a guide dog, or run a rat through a maze, that's something a human could do. Probably pretty well, though maybe a little slower at first, and not look as cute. But we have to make allowances.
3. Employers and their silly, self-indulgent ads
Really, how about writing ads that actually sound attractive for once and say something about the job? So we can apply? I am very sick of reading an ad that's a page long and goes on about this globally recognised company and then when you get to the bottom of the ad you realise it said nothing about the job position. Damn, am I going for CEO or sandwich trolley lady? I wouldn't have a clue. Do I write about how darn cool I look in a suit and what fantastic leadership skills I have and how great I am at wooing Japanese businessmen, or how great I am with slapping turkey and lettuce between slices of rye?
It's a mystery.
Every time someone puts out one of these ads it's seriously a waste of time for the whole economy because unemployed people waste their time reading it and trying to figure it out, possibly waste their time writing a misguided application for it which gets nowhere, when they could have been applying for ones in line with their skills and getting a job.
4. Recruitment Agencies who put out Sham Ads
Frustrating and again a waste of people's time and money. You know who I'm talking about, Gemteq Executive.
5. Recruitment Websites/Agencies who File Ads Improperly (or their filters don't work)
It seems some people have worked the filters so their ad appears everywhere, and filters don't filter it out. So their luscious ad for being a Manager for Whoop Whoop company needing a degree in Engineering and five years experience, based in Perth appears even if you put on the filter NSW - Sydney - West and want only Media - Performance jobs or something.
Yeah, sure, you want your job out there, but the reason people put these filters on is because when they say Sydney, they are not interested in Perth. At ALL. So you're wasting your time, annoying people and making everyone's search slower and more difficult. Pains in the Asses.
6. People who don't yank the ad and the position has been filled 3 months ago.
I can forgive a delay of a couple of days, things are busy and your newbie has been occupying your time. But it is very annoying and another waste of time to have an ad sitting on a website (or anywhere) saying you want someone, and then you go to all the trouble of applying and find out that the position was filled - over a month ago. Thanks a lot.
Monday, 10 August 2009
Are you ... no actually, I'm not?
One of my big problems with job ads is I take them very literally and I am too damn honest.
Honesty is supposed to be considered a good point with employers, that is, like don't steal from petty cash.
But you're not supposed to be too honest, like honest about what you really think about yourself, otherwise only the egomaniacs would have jobs out there, considering the way jobs are written.
Unfortuantely, I go through these weird dialogues in my head when I read job ads. Or maybe they should be called monologues because I am playing the job ad as well. (By the way my general lack of enthusiasm for writing job applications comes into play a lot here, I won't pretend that's not the case.)
Case #1
Do you have a PASSION FOR TAX and LAW ???
Ummm no. Who in their right mind does? Scratch that. Move on.
Case # 2
Good with numbers? Then ...
I think I found a number that didn't like me once. It was a thirty one. I said nice things to it and but it just didn't do anything I wanted. I don't know ...
Case # 3
Talented All-Rounder Wanted!
All around what?
Case #4
You must be a team player!
That reminds me of Mark who hated me on that fourth grade team, and the time I busted that group up at school, and how I didn't make the netball team, and fingerpainting in kindy when no one wanted me on their group because I wanted to do a red background, and how I prefer playing solitaire ...
I don't make the cut.
Case #5
Do you want to be part of our huge internationally respected firm?
(gulp) Actually I'd just like to know which firm it is, whether it's near a cheap sushi bar and a bus stop, whether the manager is a control freak or a nice persoon and whether there is a "free cookies" jar in the kitchen. Why are you hiding the important stuff? What is wrong with you. this is suspect. I don't care whether someone I don't know in Texas respects me. Why should I? Are you blabbering on about this irrelevant crap because you are hiding the fact that you supply those cheap black biros that never work to all your colleagues? I KNEW IT!!!!
Case #6
Must enjoy interacting with our large client base and working with colleagues!
Only if they aren't idiots, slackers, assholes, or arrogant bastards.
Case #7
Are you the FUN LOVING TYPE ???
I resent being called any type actually. Stop stereotyping me. It's demeaning. If I am fun-loving it's just because that's me not because I am a type. Don't insult me. Move on.
Case #8
If you're looking to build a career in law ...
I'm not looking to build a career in anything. I just want a job. Honestly, the thought of a career hasn't crossed my mind! One step at a time!
Case #9
Calling all PARRALEGALS!!!!!!!!!! Attention to Detail
Hahaha spelling mistake. Do they mean paralegals, or paralegals to work in Parramatta, or ... ho ho ho, I wouldn't work for such incompetents in a million years. maybe i should show them my attention to detail by sending them a copy of their ad with a big red circle around their "parralegals". Scratch them, move on.
Case #10
Are you flexible?
Let me see if I can still touch my toes. Damn!
Case #11
Cheerful, friendly graduates, we want you!
I haven't found a job yet. Not feeling too cheerful. Oh dear.
(Of course all this is just a really great procrastination technique, but it's never too early to begin procrastinating.)
Honesty is supposed to be considered a good point with employers, that is, like don't steal from petty cash.
But you're not supposed to be too honest, like honest about what you really think about yourself, otherwise only the egomaniacs would have jobs out there, considering the way jobs are written.
Unfortuantely, I go through these weird dialogues in my head when I read job ads. Or maybe they should be called monologues because I am playing the job ad as well. (By the way my general lack of enthusiasm for writing job applications comes into play a lot here, I won't pretend that's not the case.)
Case #1
Do you have a PASSION FOR TAX and LAW ???
Ummm no. Who in their right mind does? Scratch that. Move on.
Case # 2
Good with numbers? Then ...
I think I found a number that didn't like me once. It was a thirty one. I said nice things to it and but it just didn't do anything I wanted. I don't know ...
Case # 3
Talented All-Rounder Wanted!
All around what?
Case #4
You must be a team player!
That reminds me of Mark who hated me on that fourth grade team, and the time I busted that group up at school, and how I didn't make the netball team, and fingerpainting in kindy when no one wanted me on their group because I wanted to do a red background, and how I prefer playing solitaire ...
I don't make the cut.
Case #5
Do you want to be part of our huge internationally respected firm?
(gulp) Actually I'd just like to know which firm it is, whether it's near a cheap sushi bar and a bus stop, whether the manager is a control freak or a nice persoon and whether there is a "free cookies" jar in the kitchen. Why are you hiding the important stuff? What is wrong with you. this is suspect. I don't care whether someone I don't know in Texas respects me. Why should I? Are you blabbering on about this irrelevant crap because you are hiding the fact that you supply those cheap black biros that never work to all your colleagues? I KNEW IT!!!!
Case #6
Must enjoy interacting with our large client base and working with colleagues!
Only if they aren't idiots, slackers, assholes, or arrogant bastards.
Case #7
Are you the FUN LOVING TYPE ???
I resent being called any type actually. Stop stereotyping me. It's demeaning. If I am fun-loving it's just because that's me not because I am a type. Don't insult me. Move on.
Case #8
If you're looking to build a career in law ...
I'm not looking to build a career in anything. I just want a job. Honestly, the thought of a career hasn't crossed my mind! One step at a time!
Case #9
Calling all PARRALEGALS!!!!!!!!!! Attention to Detail
Hahaha spelling mistake. Do they mean paralegals, or paralegals to work in Parramatta, or ... ho ho ho, I wouldn't work for such incompetents in a million years. maybe i should show them my attention to detail by sending them a copy of their ad with a big red circle around their "parralegals". Scratch them, move on.
Case #10
Are you flexible?
Let me see if I can still touch my toes. Damn!
Case #11
Cheerful, friendly graduates, we want you!
I haven't found a job yet. Not feeling too cheerful. Oh dear.
(Of course all this is just a really great procrastination technique, but it's never too early to begin procrastinating.)
Hell is a Blank Keyboard
This was last night's nightmare, folks.
I had a terrible dream last night that I started a new job (that wasn't the terrible bit but it could have been) and I had a blank keyboard. I mean, people, there were no letters or things on the keys. I decided to wing it and tried to type anyhow but I wasn't very good. I got madder at the keyboard and started pressing every bloody key combination harder and harder to no avail, faster and faster. No result!
Anyhow after very coolly making lots of mistakes and not knowing what the hell I was doing for about four hours I decided to cave in and ring tech and they said "MARIA! We've been waiting for you! Why haven't you called us earlier?"
I said, "How did you know I was going to call? By the way I've got this silly blank keyboard and it doesn't work and I don't know what keys do what ..."
They said, "Didn't you know that whenever you press one of the keys on those keyboards it automatically sends an email to tech saying "My keyboard is one of those blank ones that doesn't work, I will call you soon requesting a proper keyboard, please wait for my call?" We've been waiting all day for you to call!"
This is probably how tech at many workplaces works. Be afraid. Be very afraid.
I had a terrible dream last night that I started a new job (that wasn't the terrible bit but it could have been) and I had a blank keyboard. I mean, people, there were no letters or things on the keys. I decided to wing it and tried to type anyhow but I wasn't very good. I got madder at the keyboard and started pressing every bloody key combination harder and harder to no avail, faster and faster. No result!
Anyhow after very coolly making lots of mistakes and not knowing what the hell I was doing for about four hours I decided to cave in and ring tech and they said "MARIA! We've been waiting for you! Why haven't you called us earlier?"
I said, "How did you know I was going to call? By the way I've got this silly blank keyboard and it doesn't work and I don't know what keys do what ..."
They said, "Didn't you know that whenever you press one of the keys on those keyboards it automatically sends an email to tech saying "My keyboard is one of those blank ones that doesn't work, I will call you soon requesting a proper keyboard, please wait for my call?" We've been waiting all day for you to call!"
This is probably how tech at many workplaces works. Be afraid. Be very afraid.
Sunday, 9 August 2009
Flexible on the Job
Now I'm all for multiskilled lawyers. And being a paralegal comes with more than just legal research and court work and legal admin, sure.
I've been there and done that sort of thing. Made plenty of coffees, ordered food, written ads for wineries, even babysat for grandchildren. Flexibility on the job. All for it.
But now, out of work as I am, I searched MyCareer for a law job and limited my search to Legal - Law Clerks/Paralegals NSW, and here's one job ad that came up:
Junior
JUNIOR Lawnmowing. Must be fit, reliable & willing to work. 0417 249 309
Hmmm.
That's a new one. I didn't take up Lawnmowing Law as my elective, but it's a possibility.
I've been there and done that sort of thing. Made plenty of coffees, ordered food, written ads for wineries, even babysat for grandchildren. Flexibility on the job. All for it.
But now, out of work as I am, I searched MyCareer for a law job and limited my search to Legal - Law Clerks/Paralegals NSW, and here's one job ad that came up:
Junior
JUNIOR Lawnmowing. Must be fit, reliable & willing to work. 0417 249 309
Hmmm.
That's a new one. I didn't take up Lawnmowing Law as my elective, but it's a possibility.
Friday, 31 July 2009
Something they didn't teach at law school ...
Languages.
I'm looking for a new job, in this job market and also while I'm studying part-time a paralegal or admin or research assistant role would be quite nice, something with set hours.
I look up so many start-up jobs and it is all about being able to speak a second language, often specified as Korean or Malaysian or Chinese or Italian, but sometimes just being able to speak another language.
I wish they'd offered some of these as electives at Law School, it seems they would have served me better in my career than my course on Post-Communist Law and Legal Theory, fun though that subject was.
I'm looking for a new job, in this job market and also while I'm studying part-time a paralegal or admin or research assistant role would be quite nice, something with set hours.
I look up so many start-up jobs and it is all about being able to speak a second language, often specified as Korean or Malaysian or Chinese or Italian, but sometimes just being able to speak another language.
I wish they'd offered some of these as electives at Law School, it seems they would have served me better in my career than my course on Post-Communist Law and Legal Theory, fun though that subject was.
Friday, 17 July 2009
My kind of job filter
I'm searching for jobs, and I just wish there were a different kind of job website.
Right now I'm not too picky about exactly what kind of job I do because I don't have an exact career path. In fact, it would be fair to say I don't have any career path. I'm not like one of those people who can say "I'm an unemployed electrician looking for another electrician's job" because basically I don't know the first thing about electrician's stuff or anything much else definitely for that matter. In fact I have years and years of education stuffed into this brain of mine (and thanks to that, a huge HECS debt) but no real career path. I guess you wouldn't sell me as a career development planner or advisor then.
I can do very skilfully what a heap of other people can do, which is basic office work and research in non-specific areas, which means I could probably be a clerk in some kind of role but that pretty much means looking in every single area posted in the job ads, because there are clerks and people who want people who can type and write and turn on a computer and shuffle paper around and think a bit but not too much everywhere. Dammit.
When you shuffle through these ads it's boring as hell. And rather overwhelming. So you try to use the internet filters which aren't much help. You can search by industry. No thanks. Search by location - how picky should I be? Search by salary - hell, why should I limit myself?
What I really want to filter out of my searches are the following ads but there don't seem to be search buttons allowing me to filter them out, which is annoying:
*ads asking for your academic transcript. I hate them asking what grades you got in first year uni.
*old ads. The ones that look ok but when you write to them they tell you they found someone for that job five weeks ago. Why the heck don't they take the ad down then?
*ads which spend three quarters of the ad in self-interested wank going on about their exciting new firm and project and their great feel-good team and breakthroughs and achievements and say pretty much nothing about the job. Please, please, please don't do that to me ... oh and by the way they usually have stupid sounding names too.
*ads which sound ok but tell you the only way to apply is through the online process, which you need to register for, which is a long involved process including filling in a questionnaire and having to write your resume into little boxes already pre-packaged by them, and doesn't allow you to add in any extra info to sell yourself. Also, your computer times out on you about 7 times in the first two steps.
Did I say something about not too picky about a job?
I'm just picky about the ad.
Right now I'm not too picky about exactly what kind of job I do because I don't have an exact career path. In fact, it would be fair to say I don't have any career path. I'm not like one of those people who can say "I'm an unemployed electrician looking for another electrician's job" because basically I don't know the first thing about electrician's stuff or anything much else definitely for that matter. In fact I have years and years of education stuffed into this brain of mine (and thanks to that, a huge HECS debt) but no real career path. I guess you wouldn't sell me as a career development planner or advisor then.
I can do very skilfully what a heap of other people can do, which is basic office work and research in non-specific areas, which means I could probably be a clerk in some kind of role but that pretty much means looking in every single area posted in the job ads, because there are clerks and people who want people who can type and write and turn on a computer and shuffle paper around and think a bit but not too much everywhere. Dammit.
When you shuffle through these ads it's boring as hell. And rather overwhelming. So you try to use the internet filters which aren't much help. You can search by industry. No thanks. Search by location - how picky should I be? Search by salary - hell, why should I limit myself?
What I really want to filter out of my searches are the following ads but there don't seem to be search buttons allowing me to filter them out, which is annoying:
*ads asking for your academic transcript. I hate them asking what grades you got in first year uni.
*old ads. The ones that look ok but when you write to them they tell you they found someone for that job five weeks ago. Why the heck don't they take the ad down then?
*ads which spend three quarters of the ad in self-interested wank going on about their exciting new firm and project and their great feel-good team and breakthroughs and achievements and say pretty much nothing about the job. Please, please, please don't do that to me ... oh and by the way they usually have stupid sounding names too.
*ads which sound ok but tell you the only way to apply is through the online process, which you need to register for, which is a long involved process including filling in a questionnaire and having to write your resume into little boxes already pre-packaged by them, and doesn't allow you to add in any extra info to sell yourself. Also, your computer times out on you about 7 times in the first two steps.
Did I say something about not too picky about a job?
I'm just picky about the ad.
Monday, 6 July 2009
Employment Theory
I'm on the job prowl yet again, and I sent off a job application to a law firm. It actually seemed like a pretty interesting jobs and one that I would really have liked to have, not just one of those filler jobs or "better than nothing" kind of jobs.
After a while I received an email telling me that they were "inundated with applications "and sorry, I didn't get the job.
Who DOES get these jobs? You know, the jobs that people actually think are interesting and wouldn't mind actually doing that are posted on the web?
I think it's a bit like winning the Lotto. These people are phantoms. I can't imagine they really exist. to be certain, I'm not one of 'em.
I have this feeling they don't really exist, it's just one of those ploys that's meant to keep us going and working in silly jobs and using these websites, the lure that there are actually cool jobs out there and they are searchable on the web. You know, they'll stick up a crock job on the web and people will "inundate" them with applications and then they will reject everyone saying "sorry the standard of applications was very high and unfortunately yours was not chosen" and then there is someone high up rolling about the floor laughing, ready to make up another amusing ad and go through the process again.
In fact, their job sounds pretty cool!
After a while I received an email telling me that they were "inundated with applications "and sorry, I didn't get the job.
Who DOES get these jobs? You know, the jobs that people actually think are interesting and wouldn't mind actually doing that are posted on the web?
I think it's a bit like winning the Lotto. These people are phantoms. I can't imagine they really exist. to be certain, I'm not one of 'em.
I have this feeling they don't really exist, it's just one of those ploys that's meant to keep us going and working in silly jobs and using these websites, the lure that there are actually cool jobs out there and they are searchable on the web. You know, they'll stick up a crock job on the web and people will "inundate" them with applications and then they will reject everyone saying "sorry the standard of applications was very high and unfortunately yours was not chosen" and then there is someone high up rolling about the floor laughing, ready to make up another amusing ad and go through the process again.
In fact, their job sounds pretty cool!
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