Tuesday 30 January 2007

I'll die for the floppy hat cause ...


What to do if your hat looks somewhat - actually a lot - like the above?

Acting upon the advice of valuable posters and fear of sunburn I purchased a hat, one that i'm not about to give up now as it cost me an ourageous sum of $10 at Paddy's Markets so I've got to wear it enough times to get my money's worth. I've been diligently wearing it, scrunching it, lending it to puppies and cooking soup in it to do so.

Report card: I haven't got sunburn yet.

However, I look really stupid.

Also, this hat (apart from being black, so it absorbs heat - a bad scientific choice on my part) - is floppy.

This means it flops down round the sides of my head and acts a bit like blinkers on a horse.

Times I have been almost knocked down by cars in the past twelve days as a result of a floppy hat blocking my side vision: 53

Death by sunburn or by floppy hat blinkering: Who decides?

I've stuck resolutely to the hat simply because I won't let Paddy's Markets rip me off. Over my dead body.

7 comments:

TimT said...

Yikes! It's the mathematical theory of chaos masquerading as a hat!

Ask a geek out on a date or something, the hat will immediately spark off some witty repartee on an equation for chaotic parabolas or something like that.

Maria said...

And I thought the reason I attracted geek-suitors was because the light reflected off my scarily rounded glasses, giving me an alien-laser-beam-eye-look that took them back to their childhood memories of bad eighties sci-fi movies.

I'm crushed.

TimT said...

Well, if you learn to train those laser beams on said geek-suitor's enemies and thereby catch them in your Glasses Of Death, I'm sure they'll be duly impressed.

ras said...

Maybe its my inner geek, but I kinda like the floppy hat, and as most trenoids will say, Fashion over function baby.

Alexis, Baron von Harlot said...

Maria, my dear, I can't help but feel that our identities are starting to merge, and I'm not sure if I can afford it. (Two me's, on one salary: something's gonna give.) Firstly, I read in your profile, you are a chocolate addict. No you're not. That's me. And I've done twenty-four days of excruciating de-chox to prove it. Secondly, you claim to be at Coogee on the 26th January. *I* am the one who was at Coogee on the 26th January. True, there were 7000 other people, and you might have been one of them - but still, uncanny. Thirdly, you've taken up the floppy hat cause. That is MY cause. MINE. MY FLOPPY HAT CAUSE.

Maria said...

Fashion over function, baby.

I like it, ras. I like it.

That explains why I bought myself a pair of heels yesterday after years of loving my fluffy purple slippers.

Not that my purple fluffy slippers didn't have a certain aesthetic appeal and didn't garner attention ... a lot ...

Maria said...

You can't be me Alexis (I say in comfort)

I couldn't stand 24 days of de-chox, dammit.

Unless perhaps if there were a lifetime's supply of free chocolate at the end of the 24 days as a reward.

But perhaps I couldn't even stand it then.