Wednesday, 7 February 2007

The Interview: Please sedate me

I can never remain cool, calm and collected in an interview, even if I really don't care about the job.

Why is it you go for an interview at a volunteer centre (read: unpaid), the staff are worse dressed than you, it's out of the way and pretty boring, and you STILL have a panic attack?

Who the hell are they to judge you?

Dammit ... they still do.

I plonked myself down in the dark little room and stared at its dusty couches, and suddenly, I was more deperate than Susan Mayer in Desperate Housewives, more paranoid than Monk, and I spewed out verbal garbage faster and more maniacally (is that a word?) than Elliot from Scrubs, except without sounding as intelligent. At least Elliot gets in some big words. The only long words I managed were some "Errrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrh"s. I can get some pretty impressive ones in, though.

I was still having spasms when they shovelled me out into the street later, so I'm not quite sure how the interview ended. I think it was a bit of the "don't call us, we'll call you".

At least I seemed to make an impression.


Friendless said...

Yes, "maniacally" is a word. How else would you describe my laugh?

Maria said...

Ummm - could you laugh a bit louder? Not getting great blog reception.

Thank you, Blog Technical Support for OJ Snobbery (have been working on this for 3 weeks now!)